


Let's go home

by Zenytra



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hugs, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, its gonna be ok at the end don't worry, why do i make my babies suffer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-03 06:21:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20260390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zenytra/pseuds/Zenytra
Summary: ***TRIGGER WARNING SUICIDE ATTEMPT***Loki thinks if he could end it all for real this time.Peter comes to the scene and tries to stop him.(An au where Loki has joined the Avengers.)





	Let's go home

_There was nothing._

_Just emptiness, flowing with his slow heartbeat._

_Loki looked down, the water surface was so far away, just, waiting for him._

_He thought_

_tried to think_

_If_

_If he just did it now_

_If he just jumped_

_He has done it before, let go._

_Why not now?_

_Do it_

_End it_

_For real this time._

He knew, he knew this was a mistake.

But the urge was too strong

He couldn't back away anymore.

His eyes darted straight down. The Brooklyn Bridge was quiet, in the dark, he still could see the dark murky water.

Loki's eyes were foggy, he let the tears roll down from his cheeks, not bothering to wipe them away.

It didn't help.

Loki spread his arms.

Like a bird to take it's first flight.

Wide and open.

In the back of his mind, he wanted the gesture to be meted with an embrace, thinking about it. Made him tremble.

It was better like this.

For him,

for Thor... for everyone.

He felt the wind blow, with an exhale, he closed his eyes.

"Mr Loki!"

Loki's eyes flew open hearing a familiar voice behind him, he was still standing on the edge, his lids felt cold from the tears.

"Why... what are you doing here?"

_No.._

"What... What are you doing..?" Loki heard the nervousness and confusion in the boy's voice now closer.

_Oh no.. Not now Peter.._

Loki was still in his place, Peter came closer slowly.

"Loki?"

"You should be home Peter. Stark is probably worried about you." Loki said with the most normal voice possible, fearing it would crack from the tears. He really didn't want to do this, not with Peter..

"Go home Peter, please." Loki said, the wind started to pick up speed.

Peter was quiet. Loki's heart hammered. He still stood with his back facing the boy. Arms lifelessly hanging on his sides.

"Loki, get off the edge." Peter's tone changed, it changed and it felt like a stab in the heart. He knew what he was doing. He knew what he was about to_ do. _

Loki breathed, fresh tears rolling down from his cheeks to the water below.

"Loki please. Come here." Peter's voice wavered, Loki couldn't blame him. But it was unnecessary. The emotions, the crying, the care it was all so **unnecessary.**

"Peter please. Just. Go. please.." 

Loki turned to face Peter, he was wearing his suit, the white spider eyes looking at him. Even with the mask, Loki saw the mix of emotions in Peter.

Peter saw Loki's eyes, so unfamiliar, so alien to Peter. His usual sly and mysterious green eyes were now puffy and red, welled up with tears. Peter took a step closer.

"Peter don't come closer. Just don't" Loki stuttered a bit, Peter stopped.

"It's ok Loki." Peter said calmly, trying to be as careful as possible. Loki's pulse quickened.

"You need to leave Peter. I'm not going to tell you twice." Loki raised his voice a bit more, his heart felt like it was going to burst.

"It's ok, please just look at me. Loki." 

Loki wasn't even aware he started to cry, to shiver. Peter took off his mask.

Loki saw Peter's messy hair all over the place, strands of his hair started to plaster to his cheeks from the light rain. 

"Can you look at me Loki? Can you do that for me?" 

Loki shook now. His mind started to run, started to wake. He, didn't know what to do. What to think.

Loki looked at Peter, he was scared as well. But kept calm._ Smart kid.._

"I.. I.." Loki whispered. 

"Why Loki?" 

That stunned him.

Why?

"What do you..?"

"Why Loki? Why are you doing this?" Peter voice cracked a bit.

"You're the most amazing person I have ever met." Peter said.

Loki's eyes widened.

"What..?"

"You, you have taught me so much. You have cheered me up when I was sad, you have helped me with my homework when Stark didn't have time, you have stayed up with me trough the night when I couldn't sleep, you saved my life from a deadly laser and healed me. You are reason I am better, I know much more and will learn, thanks to you Loki. You matter** Loki**. You matter to your brother, you matter to others, you matter to **me**."

Peter started to sob quietly at the end.

He reached out his his tiny red gloved hand to Loki.

Loki looked at the boy, his hand extended to him. Peter looked at Loki directly to the eyes. 

"Come home Loki."

_Peter.._

After a silent moment, the rain falling on to them, the distant sounds of the city's late night traffic. 

Loki took Peter's hand.

When Loki stepped to Peter from the edge. Peter took the moment, embracing Loki to a hug.

Peter knew Loki wasn't the hugging type, but took the moment.

Peter felt the slim arms closing around him, hugging back. Followed by shivering, then sobbing.

Loki rested his head on Peter's shoulder, burying his face.

"Thank you.." Loki whispered, tightening his grip.

"Let's go home." Peter said, making Loki feel welcome.

Making him feel like he mattered.


End file.
